Thursday, November 5, 2009

"the gays"

apparently i'm a lesbian. or at least that's what a mysterious, yet to be discovered, person i used to work with thought. if you've read anything in this blog, you know this to be false. but ba-scuuuuuse me for being affectionate with my friends in public. girls do weird stuff with each other all the time, kiss in bars (have not done this), hold hands in public (all the time), link arms, etc. without being gay. we just love our friends and don't care who knows it. you kiss your sister, hug your girl cousin, and link arms with your mom. you love your relatives and sometimes your friends become your family. that said, even if i was gay, in this century, why does it matter?

my gay friends are brilliant, fantastically creative, gifted, happy people.

as revolting as bumping uglies with parts that are like mine sounds, my gay friends find my sexual activities just as vile. what's more... who really gives a shit anyway? i mean i could walk around telling everyone "i'm heterosexual which means i like to boink boys." no one would bat a lash, even if i used the four letter eff word. but if two guys/girls hold hands in public... omg. sound the alarm. it's so backwards... what we find offensive. gay or straight... unless you're in porn, you're not having sex 24/7.

it just irritates me that some of my most amazing friends are criticized because they happen to be attracted to people of the same gender. and when i say amazing, i really mean amazing in the WOW! sense not in the cliche-overused-word sense. they trump most people i know in smarts, creativity, beauty, style and fashion (which are the same and very different), compassion, generosity, grace, perseverance, work ethic, and hope. did i mention they are HILARIOUS?

the gay marriage debate has sparked this fire under my butt today. i recently read an article about gay marriage that really got under my skin. my heart just breaks for these people. my comment was this:

i would much rather see a great homosexual marriage rather than some of these awful heterosexual ones. (hello, jon & kate) i am openly christian, but i refuse to judge someone based on their sexuality. would i vote for gay marriage? absolutely. i think it’s ridiculous that we allow some members of our military to have “contract marriages” so they can have more money or allow people who just met to get married in vegas and treat it like a joke. i don’t believe that gay marriage is as offensive as either of those things. in fact, i believe if the relationship is based on trust and love, no matter what their gender, they should be allowed to get married. gay or straight. period. true love does not offend me. getting married by elvis does.

don't flame me for the military comment, it exists. i lived it. (at least my ex-husband did... i was in love, he just wanted money, or at least that's all i can gather from his lack of respect for me and his need for other women. that's another post.) the point is, people i love are being hurt because our society says: "kill a baby? don't mind if you do! marry someone you love? just a minute there, pal." and damn it, that just sucks. don't bother pardoning the bluntness either, because it's truth all stripped of the politically correct blahfuckblah, and i'm not sorry for that. i'm tired of my friends having to feel like they don't matter in a country where they pay taxes, volunteer their time and spend their money on our economy just like any other legal citizen. it's not just about the marriage certificate. hell, according to grey's anatomy you can be married on a post-it note and it's still a contract. it's about the basic right of a human, the basic right of a legal u.s. citizen. we allow "the gays" to vote, pay taxes and make other decisions that effect our lives but refuse to allow them to marry someone they love because... ? here are some reasons i have heard that make my eyes roll into the back of my head.

1) "our children will see it." yes, they sure will. and like i said before, i would much rather see and have my children see a loving happy relationship than an abusive unhappy one, gay or straight. this point has no validity. our children see and hear all kinds of things. sex on tv, swearing on the radio, violence in their own neighborhoods, teen pregnancy... and yet gay marriage is what some parents are worried about.

2) "it goes against the very foundation of what our country was built upon." excuse me, but make up your damned minds. are we a christian nation or are we still trying to separate church and state? it seems to me that when it's convenient we pull out the Jesus cards. give me a break. i'm a christian. i believe in God and sin and prayer and the bible and all of those things. i do not believe it's my right to judge.

3) "people will abuse the system." hello? can we please take a step back and worry about things that need to be worried about? things like taking advantage of: welfare, food stamps, HETEROSEXUAL marriage for money and tax benefits, illegal non-citizens, tax write offs, unemployment benefits, school districts being shut down due to "school of choice" programs, bankruptcy, etc. Those things cost me money. My two good friends getting married? Not a dime, except for a great wedding gift, which they deserve.

maybe someday i'll get to buy that gift, for now i'll just keep voting.


Allyson said...

and you're not even in the bible belt. we will never see that day...sadly.

sarah said...

i could not agree more! many of my gay friends are also some of my most intelligent, creative and talented friends. one of my closest gay friends is pre-med and can't marry the love of his life? another is some kind of crazy double biology / genetics major something-or-other and will be making 6 figures after college. but she can't marry her girlfriend of four years? nonsense.

Karrisa Francis said...

awwww... you are so sweet to say so many nice things about me. You should meet some more gay people though. The others can be kinda cool too. :)

Seriously, nice blog Kallay. It warms the heart to hear a nice, straight, christian girl like yourself be so loving and accepting. Gives me hope. :) You're a good person.

kallay said...

Haha! Karrisa, you crack me up! And thank you! One of my friend's friends wrote an article about the gay marriage topic after the elections on Tuesday. He was pretty upset about it, being gay. I read it and it sparked this blog. It's just so sad...